January 2017

Controversy surrounded the number of people that attended Donald J Trump's swearing in ceremony.
What we do know is that at least 65 million people were also swearing at the same time.

The Boy Scouts will now be accepting transgender boys.
When Johnny gets his period he'll have a hard time explaining why the first aid kit won't help.

President Obama gave $221 million dollars in humanitarian aid to the Palestinian Authority before leaving office.
The humanitarian aid was to insure the health of the Palestinians who are deficient in Vitamin C4.

Sally Boynton Brown who is running for the chair of the DNC said her job was to "shut other white people down".
Ms. Brown believes that racism is a genetic mutation only present in Caucasians, and while there is no cure only the DNC can control the symptoms.

The N.Y. Times will use layoffs, and other cost cutting measures to make up for declining ad revenue.
These will probably be the only jobs Trump will not be able to save. 

CNN: Assassinating Trump prior to inauguration could put Obama cabinet member in office.
Just wondering if all the journalists at CNN were executed would it result in a peaceful transfer of power to MSNBC.

Michael Moore plans for "100 days of resistance" against Donald Trump.
Michael Moore should try 100 days of resistance on a Nordic Trac.


                                                          The Women's March 2017


Photos of vagina hats. Gives the phrase getting head a whole new meaning.
                                                      



Photo of the aftermath of the Women's March in NYC. Apparently women's rights include the right to discard trash with the same concern they have for the unborn.

The Secret Service isn't pleased with the comments Madonna made at the Women's March when she said "I thought an awful lot about blowing up the White House".
Madonna went from blowing penises to blowing up the White House. The CDC should be investigating her for transmitting venereal diseases that have yet to be classified.

Hillary Clinton tweeted support for the "Women's March" and said "We're Stronger Together".
Most people don't know that if Hillary had won the election she would have had worn a Givenchy designer vagina outfit for the inauguration.

Non Braking News: All the news that won't slow you down.